We are looking for a Badass CFO

(Direct report on the right)


Hey! We're a start-up winery from Sonoma with our office in Redondo Beach. We are four years old and our wine is for sale in 36 states with the top distributors, and for sale in every major (reputable) chain in CA. Sooooo since things were running smoothly we decided to make our lives fucking crazy and be the first winery in the world to legally make and sell marijuana infused wine... I’ll leave that one there for a second. So it turns out it's not just a line extension that we throw cannabis into, nope, we have to start a whole new company. New corporate structure, new legal path, new product development, new investors, new relationships with new distributors in a new industry. It’s a lot of new. And we have another side project that is even more time-consuming. So that is where you come in.

We need help with all the $$$$ stuff and are looking for a hungry hungry hippo to come in and not only take care of the bookkeeping logistic side of the business but make sure we don’t run this thing into the ground and spend more than we make.

There is still day to day operations that have to be taken care of, things like processing orders, handle bill-backs, run payroll through ADP, drink wine, reconcile QuickBooks, do general accounting and data entry (we have a CPA), handle AR & AP and keep us from writing run on sentences.... This also can be a 50/50 work remotely type of a job. As long as you get everything done we are good to go. Sounds chill right? It totally is, but... dear 8 pound, 6 ounce newborn infant baby Jesus, DO NOT reach out to us if you are from some shitty fly-over state looking for a change of career and wanting to move to California because your dick boss pissed you off for the last time. That's not the type of person we'll be hanging out with or hiring, so don't waste either of our time. Seriously we are not for everybody, so please please please check out our website first. www.RebelCoast.com

 

Here is what we need help with.

Accounts Receivable and Payable: Pretty self-explanatory.

Licensing and compliance:

We have a state compliance firm that handles all the details for this, but we still need to stay on top of different states compliance, and registering our wines in each state.

Order placement:

We receive PO's from 36 different distributors throughout the month. Invoices need to be created, and the wine needs to be picked up. Each distributor uses a different freight consolidator, but the wine is always picked up at our warehouse in Napa. The daily data entry is easy, it is literally copy and pasting information and emailing it to the same place every day, but it has to be done every day before 10 am for orders to get out in time.

Problem-solving:

We need as much help as possible with every aspect of our business. No one has ever tried to do what we are doing, soooo yeah.

Financial planning and forecasting:

Fundraising in the Cannabis space is not the real world. Being in a position to pick investors is unreal, and finding strategic partners is essential. So overseeing fundraising and making sure we don’t blow it on monster trucks and sharks with laser beams attached to their heads is pretty essential.

You must have 3+ years experience as a controller or CFO. We are chill, but not going to sit there and show you how to categorize assets on a P&L sheet. Also, we are old school, face time matters so you must live close to our office in the South Bay.

Start date: After Burning Man, (we are not savages)

Compensation: DOE and how much we like you

Email me ONLY after you have Googled us. It's flattering (annoying) but you can not possibly imagine the shit storm of terribly unqualified morons that shoot over resumes like I have nothing better to do then read about their serving experience at Chili’s. So just to see if you can complete a simple task put something you like about the winery in the subject line of the email or I am deleting it. I AM NOT JOKING. So reluctantly, here is the email: ComeWork@RebelCoast. Just promise me you're not one of those lame ass people who just shotguns out resumes without reading the job description, and has no qualifications, that's super annoying. In fact, if you do that, and your address is in the header of your resume, I'll be mailing a bag of gorilla shit to you for being the person you are. It's called Poopsenders.com and they have my card on file.

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